Monday, 21 May 2012

Burning Bridges Anthology - What would You Burn? by McDroll
Amazon UK

If you've not come across this brilliant anthology of short stories yet then where the heck have you been? Burning Bridges brings together a group of writers who have all had their fingers burned - not 3rd degree burns, but slightly singed at the edges. To prove that we all have a positive belief in our future as writers, we decided to put our joint talent together in an anthology.

It's pure dead brilliant!

We all get really mad at times, I know that I do - totally frustrated with the stupidity of the world that I live in. If I could get away with it and nobody would get hurt...these are the ten things that I would burn!!

10. Mobile Phone Shops - they are everywhere, taking up space on high streets around the country. No matter how many balloons they put up outside, I will never be tempted to go in. Too many deals, too confusing - life is too short to try to understand that kind of rubbish.

9. Hair Straighteners - I hate to see so many young girls waste so much of their time and energy trying to get perfectly straight hair. Get a life!

8. Tanning Salons - should be banned, melanoma is a terrible and deadly disease.

7. Cigarettes - I'd burn every last box of these dirty and disgusting poisonous, chemically laden cancer sticks.

6. High-Heeled Shoes - women's feet are not designed to be at such a ridiculous angle.

5. Spam - not the email kind but the pink stuff that my mum used to pretend was meat when I was a child.

4. Celebrity Biographies - pile them up and burn them all.

3. Peacocks - the big ones that are allowed to roam free in parks, zoos and other such places that families go to for outings. They stalk me and I end up being a nervous wreck, running to the car for sanctuary.

2. Gyms - Places of torture that cause injury - burn the lot!

1. Hairdressers - my idea of torture. Why does the hairdresser insist on asking me inane questions when I haven't got my glasses on so can't see her lips move and the hairdryer is buzzing in my ears and I can't hear her? Burn the lot - cut your hair at home - if it's a mess, don't worry, it will grow back!

What's your top ten? Go for it!

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